“Let people in your home and let them hear you laugh and be ridiculous. Let them help you cook and clean up and see you serve and learn to serve. Let them see you as real and in that reality see you work out your relationship with your husband and your God. They will see it and be amazed.”
Quote from Kim McManus from the book My Husband wants to be a Church Planter… So What Will That Make Me?
The following post comes to us from Sue Ferguson, former church planter wife, and author of the chapter “Life as a CPK (Church Planter Kid)” from My Husband wants to be a Church Planter… So What Will That Make Me? Check out Sue’s Web site www.WomanofJoy.com.
The pastor’s family of an established church is often said to live in a fish bowl. A church planter’s family doesn’t just live in the fish bowl, they invite everyone 
they meet to dive into the bowl and swim with them! This privilege offers more benefits than challenges when your expectations are realistic and healthy habits are established. Shared lives preach more clearly than the most eloquent messages.
A fish bowl needs routine maintenance; a sparkling appearance is much easier to keep than reclaim after neglect. Without a church building or because of limited access to your meeting facility, often your home becomes the church’s gathering place. Form habits that make your house always ready for guests.
Focus on tasks that appeal to individual family members and make assignments accordingly. Most of the stress of frequent guests is eliminated when you feel good about your home’s appearance each time you open the door. If your norm is neatness and order, on the occasions when things are a little in disarray, no one will care. They’ll understand you live there and feel better about the mess they left at their house to come to yours!
Fish shouldn’t be overfed and neither should your guests. Don’t burden yourself with unnecessary extravagance; simple snacks and beverages are adequate for most gatherings. When people ask if they can bring something say, “Yes, thank you.” Suggest items that require little time commitment on their part and eliminate expense for you. Keep a cabinet shelf stocked with basic items to pull from when necessary.
On occasion, plan for shared meals, such as potlucks or theme nights where you prepare the main course and others bring side dishes. Preparing food, eating around a table, and cleaning up together provide opportunities to build relationships. Dessert nights provide the same benefit. Serve ice cream and have everyone bring a topping.
Fish need a protective retreat spot or a shell under which to hide. Sharing your lives is a blessing, but you need rest, time to refresh and be replenished. Set aside time for your family. Openly say, “We reserve ___day and ___day for our family.” Let voicemail help you prioritize any calls you receive on those days. If someone knocks at your door, step on to the porch and say, “Hi, we’re enjoying some family time; what can I do for you?” People will most often respect your privacy and learn your schedule.
Looking into a fish bowl gives an illusion of what it is like to live inside; swimming alongside your family offers opportunity to teach by modeling—your marriage, your parenting and your ever-deepening relationship with Jesus Christ. Be yourself, eagerly learning from the Master and He will use your everyday activities to form a school of followers.
Enjoy the swim!
